Best Telenovela Curse Ever

Of all the fantastic curses I have heard on telenovelas, this is the best one yet:

Caerás en un remolino interminable de la desesperación y que los coyotes rabiosos se coman tus testiculos por toda la eternidad.

Meaning:
May you fall into a never-ending whirlpool of despair and have your testicles eaten by rabid coyotes for all eternity.